It's estimated that eight out of ten marriages fail because
of money problems.
Money makes people crazy! And what they believe about
it is even crazier!
Some believe money turns good people into bad people.
Some people believe money makes people selfish.
Some believe you can’t be spiritual and have money,
too.
Some believe money is nothing more than a tool (true).
Money is very important because it gives us the medium of
exchange we need to feed and clothe our families, pay the
rent, have transportation, create a comfortable lifestyle, and
make the world a better place in some way.
Money is important. It's not the most important thing in the
world but it is important.
These tips should decrease money arguments in your home:
1. Learn what you spouse really believes about money.
What role has money played in their life, what is its purpose?
2. Decide what role money will have in your marriage.
Will you use money as a way to make you feel important by
what you wear, where you live and what you drive?
Or will you use it as a simple medium of exchange?
The mistake most people make about money is giving it more
value than it really has.
Money is paper.
It's neutral - it doesn't have feelings. It doesn't have an
identity.
Money doesn’t increase our value as human beings. Our
net worth isn’t related to our self-worth.
Money isn't even the source of true wealth.
At best, money can gain us financial independence where we no longer
are required to punch a time clock or take orders from a boss.
But being financially independent is different from being truly wealthy.
Spouses confuse this issue.
And they fight about it. A lot.
Be careful about using money to meet your emotional needs.
3. Agree on how much you will spend and save.
Experts say we
should invest 10%, save 10% and give 10%.
A great book to get you started is Dave Ramsey’s
book: Total Money Makeover.
4. Create a vision for your life and
marriage.
You really can’t have a plan for your money if you
don’t have a plan for your life.
5. Evaluate your earning capabilities.
Sure, follow your passion
and not the money. But maybe there’s
a way for you to earn a little bit more to relieve financial pressure.
Also, are you working at a job that has a future and allows you
to increase your earning
potential?
Are you being fairly compensated?
Maybe it’s time for a new job or degree that offers more
options.
6. Discuss your wants and needs. You have both.
Sure, needs come first but that doesn’t mean there isn’t any
room leftover for some toys – toys make life
fun!
Discuss with each other what you need and want.
Maybe your spouse has always wanted a motorcycle or to
get
their pilot’s license.
Maybe you’ve always wanted to take a trip to Rome or Paris.
Discuss your wants and needs,
and then get resourceful about
finding ways to pay for and enjoy them.
7. Budget
Enough said. Again, Dave Ramsey’s material is a great resource.
You deserve financial peace.
8. Give
One of the laws of financial success is generosity.
The value you receive is in direct proportion to the value you give,
as a general rule of thumb. Sometimes the value you receive
isn't
in the form of monetary gain.
The more you give of yourself, the more you will have.
The more you try to keep for yourself, the less you will have.
Don’t let money be a source of chronic conflict in your marriage.
Don’t let it ruin your relationship.
And whatever you do, don’t let it be the source of your marital
happiness or
security.
Until next time, this is Mike & the Team and we want
you to be mad about marriage.
