Feel like you have more than enough time for everything you need to do? Didn’t think so.
Look, there’s never enough time for everything you feel you need to do.
But on the other hand…there’s always enough time.
If you feel your life is insanely busy and are barely holding it together, AND on top of it all your marriage is stagnant or weakening, OR things are pretty good BUT you want to make them even better, it boils down to this: Time.
But this really is a which came first kind of thing, the chicken or the egg, because there’s something even more important than time: Priorities.
So, what’s most
important to you?
Whatever it is, that’s what deserves your time and energy because it’s your highest priority. Until we give our highest priorities the importance they deserve nothing changes.
It’s YOUR time and energy.
You only have one life.
This isn’t a dress rehearsal.
So what if you are over committed? What if you’ve been saying “yes” too much because you’re too nice? How do you “find” more time?
You start by asking a different
question.
Instead of asking where to find more time for your marriage, instead ask, “How important is this relationship to me? And if things don’t change, where will we be in a year? Where COULD things be in a year from now if I made this relationship my top priority?"
Your spouse is important.
Your marriage is important.
Your family is important.
YOU deserve time to work though marriage
issues and grow your relationship.
When you improve your marriage you improve your life.
A happier marriage makes
everything happier.
A satisfying marriage is a solid foundation for a fulfilling life.
Let’s make this simple and
practical. Here are ideas to help make your marriage a higher priority:
1) Enjoy regular dates with your spouse where you don’t discuss work.
2) Schedule time daily to just talk with your
spouse.
3) Benefit from marriage counseling if you know it’d help.
If your schedules are crammed with stuff for your kids, volunteer work, work “obligations”, or wasted time watching too much TV, etc., eliminate a
few things; say “no” to some things so you can say “yes” to the most important thing: Your Marriage.
(By the way, what would your kids prefer most? A chauffeur who rushes them from one place to the next or a mom and dad, a family, to come home to?)
There’s something else we should talk about. One of the biggest offenders that steals time from couples is work.
We all have work, schedules and
deadlines. And as important as bosses are, which is more important to you? Your boss or spouse?
Be careful about sacrificing your marriage for a boss or some elusive career promotion that might not happen, or if it does you regret the price you paid to get it.
Life is about love not work even if you’re one of the lucky few who LOVES their work.
This is your life.
It’s your marriage.
If you don’t take care of your relationship no one else will.
Go through your calendars and get rid of thieves that are stealing
precious time from you and your partner.
Simplify your schedules to save/improve/grow your marriage.
You might have to say no
to volunteer activities.
You might have to say no to extra work.
You might have to say no to some after school activities.
You might have to say no to television on certain nights of the week.
If you have young kids, you’ll need someone to watch them. Find a safe and trustworthy babysitter for your
children – preferably someone who is licensed and bonded (check the nanny services in your area) so you don’t worry when on a date with your spouse.
Take the time you need and deserve to have a happier, healthier relationship with your partner. Give your marriage the VIP treatment. It deserves
it.
Until next time, this is Mike & Gayle Tucker and we want YOU to be mad about marriage!
