If we never changed, things would stay the same (how boring).
But we do change - we change all the time because we’re growing.
A marriage relationship changes over time because the spouses
are growing. Hopefully
the growth is positive.
Here’s the thing, though, sometimes growth causes marital stress
and frustration - especially when the spouses don’t share their journeys.
Sharing your goals and dreams with your spouse, and vice-versa, creates
an opportunity for you to grow together.
You can support and help each other along the way.
You can contribute to each other’s goals and dreams.
When this doesn’t happen it’s easy to feel isolated, stuck, or even held
back because you feel unsupported.
Sharing your goals and dreams strengthens
commitment and deepens
trust, intimacy and affection. This energizes your marriage.
So try to create a safe environment
where open and honest communication
takes place and where you both can share your feelings, hopes and goals
without risk of judgment.
As time passes, make it a point to practice these four habits if you want a
happier marriage:
1. Make it a point to know your values and rules — your code of conduct
of what you will and will not do. Know the same for your spouse, too.
2. Make time to stay informed about what’s happening in each other's life
so you can support each other and celebrate milestones.
3. Make decisions together. Even if you don’t fully understand/agree with
your spouse’s decision or
point of view, be supportive and understanding.
This is a higher relationship standard practiced by healthy couples.
4. Adjust, adapt, compromise. A give-and-take exchange contributes to a
happy marriage. As a loving partner, offer your heartfelt understanding, help
and support.
When you keep your hopes and
dreams to yourself, you and your spouse risk
growing apart and journeying in separate directions, which is a recipe for loneliness,
isolation, and unhappiness.
Create a beautiful life together by sharing your hopes, dreams and goals.
Until next week, this is Mike & Gayle Tucker and we want you to be
mad about marriage!
