Hi
Money Problems...
Got 'em? You're not alone!
Husbands and wives argue more about money than
just about anything else except sex, religion, and
kids.
Few things wreak greater havoc on a marriage than financial
stress -- ESPECIALLY when one spouse feels left out of the
financial planning and spending discussions.
Gayle and I learned a long time ago that we both needed
to be involved in the financial health of our marriage.
You and your partner need to be
working together as a
team regarding financial matters - especially when times
are tough.
FIVE TIPS FOR DEALING WITH FINANCIAL STRESS
One: Choose the BEST Time
Find a non-stress time AND place for you and your
spouse to
discuss finances and money problems.
Consider going to a restaurant in the evening as this offers the
chance to discuss money worries in a stress-free environment.
If you'd rather stay home, then at least make arrangements for the
children to be somewhere else so they don't overhear and become
burdened, worried or concerned about the family's finances.
Two: Prepare
Don't surprise your spouse with your money worries.
Consider making a list with your spouse of your money concerns.
This helps to keep you focused and on topic.
Three: Try to Avoid Getting Emotional
It helps if you and your spouse can discuss money problems
unemotionally.
Please, do not attack your spouse personally.
When you raise issues and discuss money problems, use "I" instead
of "you". Don't point fingers, simply state how you feel.
Four: Equal Time - Let your Partner Speak, Too
Being kind and courteous to your spouse is always important but
especially when solving money problems.
Allow your spouse the courtesy of speaking their mind. Solicit
feedback. Listen. Work together to find solutions.
Five: Plan
Just discussing your money problems won't solve them; plan
your way forward.
For example, maybe one of the first steps you choose is creating
a basic budget.
Or maybe you'll work together to create a plan that includes:
1) The steps each of you will take to improve your finances
2) Things you'll spend less money on
3) A percentage of income to save monthly
4) Any next steps, including how often you'll meet to discuss
your finances to stay on track
BONUS TIP
If the conversation becomes argumentative, let it go. People
don't think straight when they're angry.
Acknowledge how stressful this topic and situation is, and
agree on a time to resume the conversation.
These tips create a positive atmosphere and proactive process
for discussing an issue that is essential to marital happiness.
So, if money problems are taking a
toll on your marriage, take
action today by putting these tips into action to turn things
around and get back on track financially.
Until next time, this is Mike & Gayle Tucker and we want you
to be mad about marriage!
