Dear ,Adultery, infidelity, cheating...kill marriages. BUT, the
outcome doesn't have to be divorce.
Even if your marriage hasn't been harmed by "cheating", chances are it's happened to a friend of yours. Sharethese steps to help them recover & heal. Step One:
Acknowledge the wrongThe cheating spouse must come clean about the affairand acknowledge the pain & damage he or she has
caused. This isn't, "Yes, I had an affair, but if you had been a better partner I wouldn't have strayed."That's not coming clean. That's rationalization. Step Two: There must be NO contact with the third partyThis is absolutely essential if the marriage is to survive. ALL ties must be severed.Step Three: Identify & resolve preexisting problems
While these problems don't excuse the affair, their continued existence places the marriage at risk and
prevents you and your spouse from experiencing
unity, harmony and intimacy.
Step Four: Take massive action to restore trustTrust will be restored as both parties demonstrate their trustworthiness every day. Step Five: Forgiveness is essentialBoth parties will have things to forgive each other for.Without forgiveness, resentment builds; resentment is the mortal enemy to marital intimacy. One couple I worked with whose marriage was damaged by
an affair, and who went through this difficult process, emailed
me recently to say how happy they are that they did the difficult work of saving their marriage. At the close of the email they said, "Tell everyone that it is well worth the effort. Our marriage is stronger than
it's ever been. We are so happy we put in the hard work to
save our marriage."An affair doesn't mean your marriage is over. Yourmarriage isn't over until you say it is.Your relationship can recover from infidelity.There's hope: You can save your marriage! Andyour relationship can be stronger and happier than you ever thought possible.
So hang in there, and do whatever it takes to save your marriage.Until next time, this is Mike & Gayle and wewant you to be mad about marriage!
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