One Choice Away From A Happier Marriage

Published: Sat, 06/28/14

Dear ,

Face it, marriage isn't always easy or fun. You know it. I know
it. The whole world knows it.

But you're only one choice away from having a happier
marriage today. Here are six choices to get you started:

1. Start Talking
Direct communication is one of the secrets to a happy marriage.
If you're not talking, your relationship is dying.

2. Admit You Aren't God
Be humble, true and honest. You're not perfect, infallible
or all-powerful. So focus on the best and ignore the rest
for a happy marriage.

3. Celebrate the Honeymoon's Passing and...
embrace the journey ahead.

There is a big difference between falling in love and
maintaining love. But maintaining love can be every
bit as satisfying, fun and fulfilling as the honeymoon
phase.

Embrace -welcome - the process of working to create an
outstanding marriage of deep and fulfilling intimacy. It's a
profound experience to which nothing in the world compares.

4. What Goes Around Comes Around
In marriage, just like anything else in life, you get what
you give.

But love is not a contract or a transaction.

Unconditional love loves unconditionally - it gives
of itself - it doesn't trade, barter or sell.

So choose to infuse your marriage with the highest
quality of love irrespective of the kind of love you
feel you're receiving from your spouse.

5. Mend the Relationship Not Your Partner
Mending a marriage doesn't mean mending your partner.

Don't even think about changing your spouse's behavior
so you can be happier.

Thinking you can change your spouse or, worse yet, "train"
them, is a train wreck waiting to happen.

6. Counseling
As soon as serious problems arise, deal with them!

Find a qualified counselor who shares your values, then
roll up your sleeves and get to work.

These are red flags that indicate the need for counseling:

  • Loss/Lack of Communication
  • Lack of sexual intimacy
  • Frequent arguments
  • Emotional violence
  • Physical violence
  • Verbal abuse
  • Relentless financial distress
  • Chronic fights over parenting

These are just a few of the common ones.

In closing, I'd like to say that the ultimate
secret to a happy marriage is commitment.

As long as you're both committed to having a happy
marriage, you will succeed IF you're willing to do
the work, invest the time, and expend the energy to
do what it takes to make your dream marriage come true.

Until next week, this is Mike & Gayle Tucker
and we want you to be mad about marriage!