Unhappy Couples Don't Do This

Published: Fri, 03/14/14

Hi There - it's Mike & Gayle!

As we said in our tip last week, there are no perfect
marriages because marriage is a relationship between
two imperfect people.

EVERY marriage has its challenges & disappointments.

Human imperfections aside, it is possible to enjoy a
lifetime of unity, intimacy and profound joy with your spouse.

Last week's tip for having a happier marriage was to
decide to give your relationship a fresh start.

Here's another tip for having a happier marriage:

Love Is Spelled "TIME"
Researchers say that healthy couples require fifteen hours
of time together each week to have a healthy marriage.

Couples in troubled marriages need 20 hours together WEEKLY
to turn their relationship around.

Twenty hours. Wow.

How many hours do you have with your spouse each week?

You and your spouse deserve quality and quantity time
with one another.

But as long as you just have the attitude that you "should"
spend more time together, it'll never happen.

You have to make it a "must." When it's a must you'll
do it.

When it becomes a "must" in your mind, then you might
find yourself accepting fewer commitments. This means
you'll be saying "no" a whole lot more.

Saying "no" is healthy.

Start saying "no" to others so you can start saying
"yes" to each other.

It might mean scheduling fewer things for the kids
to do. After all, sometimes they're busier than
grown ups!

Making more time for each other might mean saying
no to countless hours in front of the TV.

According to studies, people watch 28 hours of TV
each week. 28 hours!

It might mean starting an exercise program so you
have enough energy to last the day instead of
flopping onto the couch at night in a comatose
state in front of the TV for 4 hours.

Say "no" to the unimportant stuff so you can
say "yes" to life.

You need quality AND quantity time with your
spouse because love is spelled: TIME.

Ways You Can Do-Time Together
It's a funny thing. When we first started dating
our mate, we couldn't get enough time - it didn't
even have to be anything special as long as we were
together.

Remember those days? What happened?

Here are some ideas to get you jump started:

  •     Do something fun with your friends
  •     Go out for a special meal
  •     Go to a ball game
  •     Attend a play
  •     Go to the movies
  •     Snuggle close on the sofa while watching your favorite movie
  •     Cuddle on the couch with candles and soft music
  •     Take a trip
  •     Go to church
  •     Go for a sunset walk
  •     Enjoy an afternoon at the beach or mountains
  •     Go on a picnic
  •     Go for a slow leisurely ride

The important thing is to spend time together - time is
more important at this stage than the activity you do.
Just make sure it's something you both enjoy.

Make This A Must!
Which means you need to make time together an absolute
must. And one of the best ways to make this happen is
to schedule it on the calendar and protect it fiercely.  And
don't feel guilty when you have to tell someone "no"
because you're already booked with your spouse!

Decide
Decide that once it's on the schedule there is NO backing
out no matter what unless for death or a life-threatening
emergency.

Nothing is more important than your relationship and
marriage. Yes, the kids are important, as is your
relationship with your Creator. You know what I mean.

So if you want to stay madly in love  (and we know you
do) then schedule at least one "date night" of some kind
for you and your spouse to enjoy within the next ten days.

(Still here? Go! Put it on your schedule. Do it now!)

Until next time, this is Mike & Gayle Tucker and we
want you to be mad about marriage!