Overwhelmed by job stress? Life spiraling out of control? Out of balance?
Fifty-two percent of couples face these stresses, and their marriage is suffering because of it.
I shared three tips last week for managing work/life distress, and, as promised, here are three more. (Last week’s tip is at the bottom of this email if you missed it.)
Part 2: Three Tips For Dealing with Work/life-balance
Distress
1. Listen
Job stress has never been worse than it is today.
Let's
not candy coat it. Most people don't like their jobs or boss and feel trapped because they need the money and benefits. So they grind away, suffering from chronic stress and unhappiness.
What do they do to feel better? Unload on their spouse.
But there's only one problem: Their spouse is struggling with the same issues.
So what should you do -- keep everything bottled up inside?
One of the most helpful things you can do for each other is listen patiently; do your best to be understanding and supportive.
Listen patiently and lovingly.
This will work wonders for your relationship.
2. Confide in someone else
If you feel like you're venting too much to your partner, find a trusted friend to talk to instead; avoid overwhelming your spouse with added stress.
Or, find a therapist - not because you're suffering from mental health issues but just because you need someone who'll listen and offer constructive advice.
At the end of the day, do you really want to spend what little precious time you have with
your spouse complaining about your job? Didn't think so.
Please remember that you're married to your spouse not your job; set boundaries by leaving your job behind when you "punch out" at the end of the day.
3. Disconnect electronically
Unless your job requires you to stay connected all of the time, don’t take work-related phone calls or emails once you’re home.
You need to relax and spend quality time with your spouse and kids. So pick a cutoff
time to put away your gadgets and stick to it religiously.
To have a healthy marriage you must set clear boundaries with regards to your career before job stress consumes your life and ruins your marriage.
Work to live. Don’t live to
work.
Until next week, this is Mike Tucker and I want YOU to be mad about marriage!
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Work/Life Balance Part 1
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Hi ,
People feel overwhelmed by life; they're overloaded and stressed. And it's hurting their marriages.
Did you know that fifty-two percent of couples struggle to maintain work-life balance?
Chances are, you’re a spouse, parent and an employee, not to mention your volunteerism.
You’re doing your best to juggle everything. Your days start early and end late. And you're doing more than is humanly possible. But you don't have the time you'd like for your marriage and family. And there's certainly not any time left over
for yourself.
This is a recipe for frustration, resentment and bitterness, not to mention stress-induced illness.
It’s a pressure cooker lifestyle that builds and builds until we vent steam all over our spouse, scalding them with our unhappiness. And although letting off steam makes us feel better, it
stresses our marriage after a while.
This topic is so important that I'm dividing it into two parts by offering three tips this week and three more next week on how to manage work/life stress in the home.
Part 1: Three Tips To Avoid Bringing Work Stress
Home
1. Vent occasionally
Sure, coming home in the evening and venting all night about your job and horrible boss makes you feel better. But your spouse can reach the point where they feel all you do is complain and are never
happy.
It’s nice to remember that your spouse is dealing with their share of work/life stress, too. So be selective about what you choose to share.
Also, limit how much time is spent complaining about work. If you complain about work immediately upon returning home, don’t talk about it for
the rest of the night.
2. Unwind
Take a few minutes after work to relax and unwind; it doesn't have to be long.
This simple ritual will make you feel so much
better.
When you get home, change clothes, take a shower, listen to your favorite music for a few minutes and then decide what you want to share with your spouse about work.
Not only will you complain much less, you’ll be more receptive to hearing about your spouse’s work
day.
3. Balance the negative with the positive
When discussing your job with your spouse, balance the negative with the positive. No matter how bad your job is, there are some good things about it, like putting food on the table or providing a roof for your family, etc. What
are some benefits you could be happy about if you wanted to be?
That's enough for now; I’ll share three more tips next week about how to manage work/life stress so as to limit its harmful effects on your marriage.
Until next week, this is Mike Tucker and I want YOU to be mad about
marriage!
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