A study conducted by Florida State University revealed that newlyweds usually always know on a subconscious level whether or not their marriage is going to work.
How is this possible?
Turns out that your first instinct about a person or a relationship is almost always right.
What Is Instinct Anyway?
Gut feelings are a form
of subconscious reasoning. As we accumulate knowledge, our brain recognizes patterns in the information.
These patterns are stored in our long term memories and enable us to instantly recognize familiar patterns when we encounter new information.
This instant recognition is what we refer to as gut feeling, intuition or instinct.
What To Do With Your Gut Feeling About Your Marriage
Following your instincts blindly or making decisions based on nothing more than a gut feeling isn’t always a good idea, as you probably know because we've all made
that mistake.
Verify your gut feeling before you trust it.
Sometimes we mistakenly identify anxiety or enthusiasm
as a gut feeling about something or someone.
How do you verify your gut feeling?
For a person of faith, the
process begins with prayer and seeking ancient wisdom found in Scripture.
Next, go somewhere without any distractions to clear your mind and think about your relationship issues; come up with a few solutions for each issue.
Then think about each of the solutions separately while paying attention to how your body feels about each one.
Do you experience any unpleasant tightness in your throat,
chest and gut? Or a pleasant, relaxed and warm feeling?
Needless to say, the right decision should feel good on some level.
Remember, discussing your instincts with your spouse can help you figure out which instincts you should trust.
But regardless of what your gut feeling tells you, never accuse your spouse without sufficient evidence because it only creates an uncomfortable environment of mistrust in your
relationship.
Simply let your spouse know that you have a feeling that something is not right. Communicate your concerns in a non-accusatory tone by sharing how you feel about the matter.
Balancing thoughts and emotions about your spouse, or a situation in your marriage, should help to strengthen your relationship, resulting in greater happiness and intimacy.
Until next week, this is
Mike Tucker and I want YOU to be mad about marriage!
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